The Go-Ahead

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noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 22:38:00 +0000

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Red (and Green) Sox

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 22:11:00 +0000

Happy St. Patrick's Day, Sox Fans.

Spring is here!

VIP Day

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 19:58:00 +0000

Very Important Picks.

If you must be at your desk--unlike students and city workers in Boston, who are celebrating Evacuation Day--doing NCAA basketball research is the ideal way to appear productive.

Last year, I took third place in my Geek Pool, where we rank all 64 teams (which I LOVE because it's so very cool) and second in my ESPN Challenge pool. It'll be tough to improve on that this year, but I'm optimistic, as always. And hey, maybe I'll beat President Obama, who filled out his bracket on ESPN this morning:

If you want to see the video--you know, as research--check it out here:

So share...who do you think will win it all? Who's a Cinderella in the making? Who's overrated?

Things I've Learned Today

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 20:59:00 +0000

1. The Red Sox are willing to sign a player to a one-day deal if he'd like to retire in a Red Sox uniform, but only if that player's name is Nomar, which begs the question: How many people on planet Earth are named Nomar?

2. One hundred calories worth of Lorna Doone cookies are tasty, but only for two seconds. And then you want more, because who is happy with only two seconds' worth of Lorna Doone?

3. Jessica and Heather of Go Fug Yourself offer the best post-Oscar style analysis of all time. Thanks for the excuse to procrastinate, girls. (BTW...I'm with you on Sigourney Weaver. No way she's sixty.)

4. It's possible to obtain a medical license in England without having the ability to differentiate between pregnancy and gout.

5. I should never, ever name a character Lindsay. If I do, Lindsay Lohan might think it's modeled after her and sue me. Apparently, Lindsay--or her lawyer, at any rate--claims that any fictional use of the name "Lindsay" is akin to using an identifiable, unique name such as Madonna or Oprah to hawk products. (The lawyer did not cite Nomar as an example.)

No Second Place at the Oscars

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 14:49:00 +0000

Well, I whiffed on my picks for Best Original Screenplay and Best Adapted Screenplay, which means I ended up in second place in my Oscar pool. This is a little embarrassing, since I'm the only writer in the group (as Homer Simpson sings, "I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T, I am so smart!") But since there isn't a second place given at the Academy Awards, I, like Meryl Streep, will have to try again next year.

BUT...there are still outfits to discuss! I thought that it was a fantastic year, stylewise. Very few misses on gowns, don'tcha think? Though once again, my prediction was off. I thought Robert Downey, Jr. would look great, and he did...if you could ignore the questionable bow tie and the horrid shoes to focus solely on the suit (which fit better than it looks in this photo. The button wasn't pulling all night, I swear.) Or simply look at his wife, Susan, whose gown rocked:

Most women cannot pull off horizontal stripes. She can.

Normally, George Clooney would be a safe bet as Best Dressed Man, but I had an overwhelming urge to grab his hand and walk him to a barber. Guiliana Rancic may have waxed poetic about Gorgeous George's longer hair during the E! pre-show, but I can't agree. Sorry, Guiliana. Instead, I have to give this year's Best Dressed Man nod to Ryan Reynolds. THIS is how every guy should look at an awards show:

Guiliana also loved the gown of RDJ's former flame, SJP. My guess is that the Fashion Police will give a thumbs-up for her Chanel Couture tonight, but I hated it. At least onscreen, it seemed frumpy and ill-fitting. So sadly--and I realize it's sacrilege in some circles to say it--this year Sarah Jessica Parker is my Worst Dressed Woman:

That being said, I suspect the Fashion Police will name Charlize Theron their worst-dressed, with what I will forever think of as the Flower Boob Dress. I don't hate this--the color is spectacular on her, and the fit is perfect--but I think it would've been far, far better had the roses been big enough to cover the entire bodice, rather than separated. (In fact, I think this gown would've been a home run if the roses covered the entire bodice.)

What do you think? Could this dress have been saved?

And then there were the gowns I absolutely LOVED. First, the woman of the night, Sandra Bullock. Classy, feminine, and perfect for an Academy Award-winning night, since it looked stunning onstage under the lights:

My other hits of the night include Vera Farmiga, in a gown that perfectly suited her coloring (and a style that could only be worn to the Oscars):

Ditto Jennifer Lopez and Demi Moore:

Elizabeth Banks, who dared to wear a drab color (I think this is a gray-lavender) and own it:

Cameron Diaz, looking the best I've EVER seen her at the Academy Awards:

Penelope Cruz, who earned my husband's vote for Best Dressed:

And...drumroll...my Best Dressed Woman of 2010, Anna Kendrick!

I thought Kendrick looked stunning on the red carpet, but when she went onstage as a presenter and I got the 360 degree view, her gown absolutely blew me away. Great color, incredible detail--it's hard to see the intricate folds and draping in this photo, though it was visible onstage--and just a perfect fit on her. She may not have come home with a statue, but she dressed like a winner.

Think the Fashion Police will agree? What were your hits and misses? Let me know!

Signs of Spring

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 18:04:00 +0000

Nope, it's not the Groundhog. It's Oscar Day! Had to poke my head out of my hidey-hole (aka, my office, where I've been working my tail off for the last month) to see tonight's broadcast, with the ever-hilarious Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin, and to toss out my predictions.

Will I win my bragging-rights-only Academy Awards pool this year? You tell me.

Best Picture: The Hurt Locker
Best Director: Kathryn Bigelow
Best Actor: Jeff Bridges
Best Actress: Sandra Bullock
Best Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz
Best Supporting Actress: Mo'nique
Best Animated Feature Film: Up
Best Foreign Film: The White Ribbon (Germany)
Best Original Screenplay: Quentin Tarantino, Inglorious Basterds
Best Adapted Screenplay: Jason Reitman & Sheldon Turner, Up In The Air
Best Documentary Feature: The Cove
Best Original Score: Up
Best Original Song: The Weary Kind (from Crazy Heart)
Best Film Editing: The Hurt Locker
Best Cinematography: Inglorious Basterds (and yes, I know this is a rebellious pick, as it's likely to be Avatar)
Best Costume Design: The Young Victoria

This year's pool ballot was taken from Moviefone's downloadable version, which only had sixteen categories, so I can't score points with Makeup or Sound Editing (I think Moviefone ballot might've been selected intentionally to throw me off my game.) If those categories had been included, I'd have picked The Young Victoria for makeup (though Star Trek has a good shot) and Avatar for all things sound.

Finally, the most important categories of all: Best dressed man-Robert Downey Jr, assuming he attends. Best dressed woman-Sandra Bullock.

What do you think?

The Upside of Being Unproductive

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 17:25:00 +0000

I tend to use my weekends to play catch-up on work. For better or worse, this tends to happen when your office is inside your house. When you see your work staring at you, it's kinda hard to ignore it.

However, I spent yesterday being completely unproductive. No writing, no paying bills, no answering e-mails or blogging. Instead, a big chunk of time was devoted to watching a "best of" series of clips of Conan O'Brien's Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. If you want to see the clips, there are a bunch you can find online by searching "Triumph the Insult Comic Dog." Or you can check this page--with some of the best Triumph segments--in this article from MSNBC:

One Last Treat From Conan's Dirty Dog, Triumph.

Laughed my head off watching these (especially the clip with the Hawaii American Idol auditions.)

After the Triumph-fest, I went to see It's Complicated and laughed some more. HYSTERICAL flick.

I've spent most of this morning in a writing frenzy, probably because I let myself have a completely brainless day of entertainment. Proof that being unproductive is, every so often, a very good thing.

Helping Haiti

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Sat, 16 Jan 2010 13:21:00 +0000

Most of the books I write are about teenagers. They explore certain themes common to teenagers around the world. These themes might include discovering that right and wrong isn't always as simple as black and white. Or the push-pull of feeling like an adult, yet being treated like a kid. The frustration of knowing what to do in a given situation, yet not being trusted to do it--or being unable to act due to restrictions placed on teens.

When I was a teen, contributing to a cause often meant a reliance on adults. Sure, my friends and I could raise money to help people in need, but cutting a check or making a credit card payment required an adult's signature. Even then, once we raised money, it took time to get to its destination. Instant online payments didn't exist.

Today, that's not the case. When catastrophe strikes, as it struck in Haiti this week, you can make a difference, all on your own, and your contribution can be used immediately.

Have a cell phone? You can text "Haiti" to 90999 and $10 will be added to your cell phone bill. If you pay that bill yourself, you're covered. If not, hand the person who pays it a $10 bill.

Have an iTunes account? You can donate there, too. There's currently a link to the iTunes donation page on the Apple homepage, or you can sign in to your iTunes account and search "Haiti."

Have a job? Ask your employer if they'll match any donations you make, or if they're taking up a collection and adding their own contributions. Having an employer contribute makes your donation go further.

I made my own donation through the Clinton Foundation's Haiti page. Former President Bill Clinton is a US Special Envoy to Haiti (he was appointed to this position prior to the earthquake) and is working to coordinate efforts to distribute food and medical supplies on the ground.

Haiti needs our help. Let's give it.

Funky Writer

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 13:00:00 +0000

Apparently, I am a funky writer. Who knew?

This week, I'll be the guest of honor on The Funky Writer radio show. (I assume, since the radio show is called "Funky Writer", that being hailed as a funky writer is a good thing!)

To check out the show's blog and get a sense of what's in store, go right here. There's a contact e-mail for the show's host, Rob Batista, listed on the right side of the blog. If there's a question you're dying to have answered, send it along to him.

The interview airs live on January 7, at 8:30PM ET. If you'd like to listen to the show (or download it to iTunes for free), click on this link to access The Funky Writer Radio Show.

New Year's Goals (Not Resolutions)

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 18:43:00 +0000

Happy New Year! For many, this is a day of sleeping late and making New Year's resolutions. In my house, it's a day for singing Happy Birthday (to my father-in-law), taking down Christmas decorations, and New Year's goal-setting.

Yep, I differentiate between resolutions and goals.

A resolution, in my mind, is an aspiration. Something you'd like to accomplish, but that isn't within your control. For me, aspirations include being a contestant on The Amazing Race, having a movie made of one of my books, and watching a no-hitter at Fenway Park. I can make progress toward accomplishing those things, but ultimate success lies in someone else's hands.

On the other hand, accomplishing a goal is entirely within your control. As nice as it is to make a list of your aspirations, regularly setting goals is better. I sit down with one of my writing buddies at least once a year (and sometimes more frequently) to set goals. Not only is it fun to talk over our goals on a regular basis, it's paid off for us both.

Over the years, we've come to the conclusion that proper goal-setting has a few requirements:

1) Accomplishing the goal must be entirely within your control;
2) You must think through the steps necessary to reach your goal and write them down (be specific!);
3) You must set deadlines for accomplishing each step and for the ultimate goal;
4) You must re-read your goals frequently, and as things in your life/career change, update your goals accordingly; and
5) When you do accomplish your goal(s), celebrate!

For instance, though "have a movie made of one of my books" isn't within my control (as I do not control Hollywood), other aspects of my writing career are within my control. I can determine what kind of books I want to write, when I want to finish them, when I want to submit to publishers, etc. When setting my goals, I might write down something like this:

• Write two books this year (Write proposal for book #1 by February 15, finish book #1 by June 15. Submit by June 30. Write proposal for book #2 by August 15, finish book #2 by December 15, submit by December 31.)

It's within my control, it's specific, it has reasonable deadlines for both the ultimate goal (December 31) and for the steps needed to accomplish the goal.

I give a copy of my goals to Elizabeth, and she gives me a copy of hers. I keep the list on my computer desktop where I can see it as I work.

As the year progresses, we'll call or e-mail each other to say, "Hey, it's February 1. Where are you on that first proposal?" As things change--say, I get a contract that says I need to write a third proposal during the year--I'll revisit the goals, change them as needed, and give the updated goals to Elizabeth. She does the same. When one of us accomplishes a goal, we both celebrate. (By the way...this week is also a celebration week, because Elizabeth's newest book, How I Met My Countess, hits the shelves. Book releases are always cause for celebration!)

Goals don't have to be limited to finishing projects. Mine aren't! My writing goals also include improving my writing (by reading certain books or taking specific writing classes and workshops), communicating with readers (through my message board/Facebook/Twitter), and getting notes/outlines started for future projects.

If you're a writer, you can move forward by leaps and bounds if you set proper goals, and what better day to get started than January 1st?

Tag, I'm It

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 16:04:00 +0000

It's Thanksgiving week here in the U.S.A., which means it's time for a little maintenance on The Go-Ahead. (If I have to clean up my home office so it's in decent shape for viewing by holiday guests, I may as well clean up the blog while I'm at it, yes?)

I'll be updating the tags over the next few days, so if things go wonky, you know who to blame. Can't promise my updated tags will be as witty as those on my favorite procrastination website, Go Fug Yourself, which boasts categories such as Fugging Through Verse, Look Into Pants, Illusory Baby Bumps, and the ever-so-popular Various Kardashians, but I'll endeavor to make the tags here at The Go-Ahead more consistent than what's currently in use.

In the meantime, may you all have many, many things for which to be grateful this Thanksgiving.

P.S.: I thought I'd add a fun clip-art photo of a feather duster to today's entry, but when I searched for one online, it brought up Charlize Theron in this dress. Consider me grateful for my laugh of the day.

Unsportsmanlike Conduct

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 12:25:00 +0000

Anyone catch this video on the news?

This is University of New Mexico soccer player Elizabeth Lambert. Before I go further: I don't want to pick on Ms. Lambert specifically. She's certainly not the first athlete to behave this way on the field, and sadly, she probably won't be the last. But she did get caught on video, which is what has sparked the intense coverage of her particular case. Well, that and the fact that she's female. I don't agree with those who think when a woman does this, it's somehow worse than when men do it. "Unsportsmanlike" conduct isn't limited to men; violence in sports knows no gender.

Whether the aggressor is male or female, I believe players who act in this manner should be suspended, if not outright banned from their sport. It's no longer a game when one player intentionally throws another to the ground in a way that risks breaking their neck. No one wants to play against a player like that. And frankly, no one wants a player like that on their team. There's a world of difference between being a competitive player (one who works hard to help a team win, which is a good thing) and a violent player.

Now, Ms. Lambert did apologize, stating, "I let my emotions get the best of me in a heated situation. I take full responsibility for my actions and accept any punishment felt necessary."

But--another rant--does an apology like that really make it better? There was no "I'm sorry." Saying those two words (and meaning them) is very different than saying, "I accept responsibility." And again, this isn't just Ms. Lambert. I hear this phrase a lot, both on television from athletes, celebrities, and politicians who've found themselves in hot water, and from run-of-the-mill folks I see in everyday life. It's become a catchphrase for, "I screwed up big time. Now let me off the hook."

Think about it. What does it mean, exactly, that someone "accept(s) responsibility?" It's an admission that someone actually did what they're being accused of (which, in Ms. Lambert's case, is on video, so duh.) And that someone is going to accept whatever punishment is doled out for their actions (and in Ms. Lambert's case, does she have a choice?) But that's not saying you're sorry for your behavior. "I accept responsibility" doesn't mean that you regret the actual action you took, as opposed to regretting the situation in which you've found yourself afterward.

In Ms, Lambert's case, she says that emotions got the best of her in a heated situation. Really? I don't think so. When a player acts that way repeatedly--punching one player, kicking others, then throwing yet another to the ground--it's not a heat-of-the-moment response to some unexpected event that happened in the game (not that that's excusable, either.) When one player strikes out repeatedly, that's a conscious decision. And it's not just Ms. Lambert. It happens all the time.

When did this become okay?

Different Writer, Different Process

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 20:16:00 +0000

There was an interesting article (interesting to writers, anyway) in Friday's Wall Street Journal called How To Write A Great Novel. It's not a true How-To so much as a Here's-How-Others-Have-Done-It.

While I've never written in the bathroom or gotten dressed up as one of my characters, over the years I've found methods that work for me. They're not the same methods that work for others. I know one author who writes all her books while sitting in her bed with her laptop on a foam lap desk. She gets lots of work done this way, but if I tried it, I'd fall asleep. On the other hand, I frequently manage to hammer out sticky plot points while gardening, but a lot of writers I know consider weeding a hellish activity.

The thing is, you only know what works for you by trying different methods, and you can't do that without actually WRITING, which is hard work. Read the article and you'll see what I mean. The gist of the piece is:

1) No one process works for everyone; the writing process is as individual as the author
2) Writing is hard work
3) Writers--yes, even the best--must be willing to revise to be successful, sometimes throwing away big chunks of their hard work in the process

All three are good lessons for any writer.

Teen Fiction 101

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 15:42:00 +0000

I frequently get questions about writing fiction for teens--how to get started, how to find an agent, etc. I have answers to several of these questions on the Frequently Asked Questions page of my website. (And if there's a writing question I've missed, e-mail me and let me know. I update the FAQ page regularly!)

However, if you're working on a project and are looking for something more in-depth than what's on the FAQ page, I'm teaching a class starting TOMORROW via WriterUniv.com. It runs the entire month of November and will be conducted exclusively online. I post lectures twice a week, so you can go at your own pace (in other words, if this month is tough for you, you can download it now and wait to read everything in January!) There's a more detailed description of my class--and many other writing classes--on the WriterUniv.com website. Registration is there, too.

Hope to see some of you there!

Paris: The Good, The Bad, and the Smelly

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 20:19:00 +0000

Okay...the laundry is done. The mail is read/filed/recycled. On to the Paris recap!

First, the Good Stuff (and with Paris, you know "the good stuff" is REALLY good!):

My hotel was across the street from not one, but TWO chocolate shops. I didn't know this when I booked the room, so talk about a pleasant surprise! Needless to say, I popped right on over, taste-tested--yum!--and left with a sizeable bag of goodies:

After that, we made a beeline for the Eiffel Tower. The line was so long--over a three-hour wait--that we decided to try another day. We crossed the Seine to the Orangerie, a fabulous little museum containing Monet's famous water lillies. The eight large paintings go all the way around two oval-shaped rooms that are otherwise white. I wish I had photos, but I was too afraid of screwing up, accidentally having the flash go off on my camera, and being escorted out and/or arrested on my first day in town. (As you might guess, no flash photos of Monet's masterpieces are allowed, and with good reason!)

"Stunning" would be an understatement when used to describe the water lillies. I could've remained parked on the benches in the middle of those two rooms for an entire day, staring at the layers in those eight paintings. (The husband, however, was done faster than that.) If you have the chance to go to Paris, do not miss the Orangerie.

Other good things?

1) People watching at the Trocadero (best done at lunch, panini in hand) or under the dome at the Galleries Lafayette department store:

2) Music in the Metro. I've always loved going on the Metro in Paris for this reason. You never know when you'll turn a corner and hear a cello or a steel-drum band, or find yourself sitting across the tracks from a guy with his harmonica and guitar:

3) The views. (Okay, Views. They're so good in Paris they should be capitalized.) First, the indoor views. I have lots of shots of Notre Dame, Sacre Coeur, and other cathedrals. But my fave is tiny Sainte Chapelle:

Being inside Sainte Chapelle gives you the sense you're walking around inside in a glass jewel box. Surreal.

And I love looking up at the Louvre from inside its glass pyramid:

Then there's what you see when you're outdoors. For instance, from the top of the Arc de Triomphe at night:

Or alongside the gargoyles atop Notre Dame:

Of course, those views are where the Bad Stuff of Paris comes in. There are a LOT of stairs! Over four hundred to get to that perch atop Notre Dame. And this was the staircase at the Arc de Triomphe. (No, it's not just the photo, you CANNOT see the bottom when you look down!):

Though maybe stairs are a GOOD thing, since they help balance out the accumulated chocolate shop, crepe stand, and bakery excesses?

Finally, I must mention the Smelly. If you're in Paris, hold your nose and take the Sewer Tour. It takes less than an hour, and you'll learn more than you ever thought possible about the history of Paris sanitation (trust me, it's more interesting than it sounds.) We climbed down into the sewers near the Pont de l'Alma to see how the system works now, and learn about what Parisians did with their--stuff--way back in the Middle Ages, then through King Louis XIV's time and Napoleon's. Believe it or not, we found it fascinating (though vile.) Fun observation: There were a ton of kids and teenagers taking the tour. I got the sense most of them liked it more than the museums.

So...what would you tour if you had the chance to visit Paris? Or if you've been there, what was your fave part? What didn't you like? Comment away!

Because It's Not Happening

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 11:50:00 +0000

I received an e-mail yesterday that went like this:

"Hi Niki! I read all your bks and luv ur blog. How come u haven't blogged about the world series? I am a MAJOR phillies fan and would like to know what u think.

pls keep making great books! K."

Well...hi, K! First, thank you for letting me know you enjoy my books. That's always the way to my heart! I'm very happy for you that your team made it to the Series. I assume you won't get much sleep for the next week or two, as you'll be busy watching TV.

As to why I haven't blogged...imagine if your beloved Phillies had gone out early this year. Well...make that times two. You'd probably feel a tad sour, right? Cough-Red Sox-cough-Rockies-choke-choke-choke. Yep, my teams blew it. The Yankees did not. I decided that the World Series is not happening this year, simple as that.

Okay, not as simple as that.

I went to Paris! France is a sure cure for baseball-related illness, don't you think?

Pictures will be posted here ASAP....

Tuesday Night Baseball

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 02:29:00 +0000

For the last three weeks, I've been taking a boot camp class. While it's very good for my muscles (I can do more pushups than ever!), and I'm having odd-yet-entertaining flashbacks to high school sports (jumping up and down bleachers and running suicides will do that), my knees feel like they were the actual part hit by a boot. I'm going through ice packs the way I usually go through ice cream. (Which brings me back to why I need boot camp. Research says ice cream is addictive, you know.)

Of course, balancing ice packs on my knees requires me to sit, which means watching even more heart-attack inducing baseball games than usual. (The fact I ponied up for MLB Extra Innings means I can watch them ALL.) The Rockies are making me happy lately, but could the Red Sox create any more drama? Coming back from being down 8-2 to make it an 8-7 game at the bottom of the ninth tonight, for the freakin' WILD CARD SPOT?

With one out, Pedroia comes within a couple feet of hitting it out, but it's caught. (No!!!) Ellsbury steals his 67th base of the season to get into scoring position. (Yay!) Martinez walks (Yippee!) Youk gets up with two on...and strikes out looking to end the game (ARGH!)

I know they'll pull it out, but sheesh. I don't need heart palpitations at the same time I'm balancing monster ice packs on my knees.

Tomorrow, my Red Sox. Tomorrow. (Pretty please?)

Turning Off The Light

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 13:34:00 +0000

The summer I turned fifteen, I got my first official job, cleaning an Army bowling alley. I scrubbed chairs, ball return machines, and even the snack bar's floor. It wasn't easy work. The best hour of the day, however, was from 12:30-1:30pm, when the televisions mounted over each lane showed The Young & The Restless. (You're probably surprised that a soap could be bowling alley fare, but this was Germany, and there was only one TV channel in English.)

Those daytime soaps changed my life, for I was quickly sucked into the show's story. I couldn't wait to see each day's episode chronicling the love triangle between Victor, Nikki, and Kevin. All these years later, I still watch, and there's still an on-again, off-again romance between Nikki and Victor.

To me, this is the magic of daytime drama. The writers are masterful at building communities full of complex characters who viewers care about, and then incorporating endless emotional plot twists to keep the story fresh. For years.

As much as I've loved Y&R over the years, I've always had a soft spot in my heart for another CBS soap, Guiding Light, and have tuned in often enough to keep up with the action. The characters are engaging, the storylines deftly plotted. And not only is it the longest-running daytime drama in the United States, it's the longest running broadcast program of any kind, anywhere in the world, having been on air (radio and TV) since January 1937.

I've learned a lot about writing from watching soaps, and many other writers I know have, too. In fact, I've learned so much, I decided it'd be fun to set a book on the set of a soap. I could play with dual storylines of the characters as they appeared on-screen, as well as lives behind the scenes. Unfortunately, as much as I knew about the on-screen lives of characters, I knew squat about what happens behind the scenes.

Thankfully, the phenomenal Jill Lorie Hurst, head writer of Guiding Light, was kind enough to spend a day with me and author Hope Tarr on the New York set of the show. It was one of the most entertaining--and educational--days of my life.

Jill gave us an overview of what it's like to be a writer on a daytime drama, then gave up most of her day to show us around. I was amazed at the efficiencies they'd created to get the show produced for as little money as possible while still maintaining the show's quality. Writers' and producers' offices converted into sets--Jill's office was the "seedy motel", while others worked in the Springfield nail salon and Reva's living room--walls would slide back to reveal the interior of a hospital. On a separate floor, an entire maze of rooms was constructed, with one set leading to another. If Reva stormed out of a restaurant, she might end up--in reality--in Josh's living room or the Spaulding study, even though it'd appear she was headed outside.

I had my photo taken in the Spaulding study...

then I snapped one of Hope a whopping thirty feet away, at the Company restaurant:

We also had the opportunity to meet some of the producers and directors--like the multitalented Ellen Wheeler, who let us hold her beautiful Emmy--and spent a good amount of time with the actors. Frank Dicopoulos hung out with us in the hallway near the actors' dressing rooms, talking about how his character has evolved over the years. His behind-the-scenes stories had us rolling until actor Lawrence Saint-Victor, who plays Remy, came up behind Frank and attempted to refute them all (before telling us he was about to surprise his wife with tickets to see wrestling at Madison Square Garden--he wasn't sure it'd be a good surprise!)

One thing made abundantly clear both to me and to Hope was that the cast, crew, and everyone else involved in Guiding Light love their show. They've worked hard to provide viewers with an escape from the stresses of everyday life (you know, the folks stuck cleaning bowling alleys.) They were grateful for the opportunity they'd been given by the network, and by each and every viewer.

I'm sure when the news came (shortly after Hope and I visited) that the show had been cancelled--and that tomorrow, September 18, would be their last day on the air--they were every bit as heartbroken as the viewers. They didn't want to see their stories end, either.

So to everyone at GL (and especially to our tour guide, Jill): Thank you. You've taught hundreds of writers about the art of story, you've entertained millions upon millions of viewers, and you've done it well. You'll be missed. And I know tomorrow's finale will be riveting television.

Party In The U.S.A....Or Schwerinborg

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 17:56:00 +0000

Fan mail is one of the best things about being a writer. I've had thirteen books and two novellas published, but never fail to enjoy the "squee!" moment of opening each day's fan mail.

Lately, however, a huge percentage of my mail has contained various forms of the same question: When will there be a movie based on the Royally Jacked books?

The answer is: I don't know. I am a writer living in Boston, not the head of a movie studio. However, I do have an agent who handles these sorts of things, so you never know! A movie or TV show is always a possibility. And it's definitely fun to think about.

I'm not sure what spurred the recent deluge of When-Is-Val-Going-Onscreen mail (do you know something I don't?), but it's been fun to read all the suggestions you have for casting.

Judging from your e-mails, the number one pick for Valerie is Miley Cyrus. I can see that--she has that clean cut, yet edgy vibe you get with Val. And, of course, there's the whole relationship with her dad (which is a huge part of the Royally Jacked series.) So that gives Billy Ray a role, too.

Miley's not the only name to hit my in-box, however. Here, some of the suggestions that have been made recently:

Valerie Winslow: Ashley Tisdale, Taylor Swift, Shailene Woodley, and Jennette McCurdy (quite a range there!)

Prince Georg: Joe Jonas (LOTS of e-mails for Joe), Daniel Radcliffe, Daren Kagasoff

David Anderson: Chace Crawford (the top suggestion), Jesse McCartney, Jason Earles

Christie Toleski: Taylor Swift (nearly as many e-mails for Taylor to play Christie as for Miley to play Val!), Emily Osment, Dakota Fanning

Jules Jackson: Kristin Stewart, Selena Gomez, Taylor Momsen

Natalie Monschroeder: Demi Lovato, Emma Roberts, Vanessa Hudgens, Miranda Cosgrove

Ulrike: Abigail Breslin, Dakota Fanning

Steffi: Minka Kelly, Nikki Reed

Fun, huh? But the one that made me call my husband to the computer with a "Watch this!" was a YouTube video trailer. Apparently, it's been posted to YouTube for several months, but I only heard about it last week.

(If that's not working, check it out right here.)

So what do you think? Who would you cast? And what about other romantic comedy books--any you're dying to see on-screen?

Favorite Writers

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 18:05:00 +0000

I'm often asked about my favorite writers. I've always put Larry Gelbart near the top of the list, so I was sad to see that he passed away this weekend.

Even if you haven't heard of Larry, you've no doubt seen his work performed on screen or stage. M*A*S*H. A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum. Oh, God! City of Angels. Tootsie. The man possessed an immeasurable wit.

If you want to learn about writing, watch a few episodes of M*A*S*H. Study how Gelbart develops his characters, making you love them, flaws and all. Learn from his brevity. Every word moves his stories forward; nothing is extraneous. I still watch M*A*S*H with an eye to learning the craft from the best in the business.

Thank you, Larry. You'll be missed.

Take That, Labor Day Picnic Pounds!

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Sun, 06 Sep 2009 13:31:00 +0000

Ha. You can eat all you want on Labor Day and it's HEALTHY for you! Check out this article:

Skinny Thighs Could Spell Your Doom

Okay, maybe not HEALTHY. But not as bad as you'd think. According to Danish researchers, people with the skinniest thighs (you know, the thighs you wish you had), have the highest chance of heart disease.

I'm not sure I believe it. There are skinny thighs that are the result of starvation (many runway models) and skinny thighs that are the result of hard work (Dara Torres.) I'd take the Dara Torres skinny thighs any day of the week over a runway model's. And I can't imagine that Dara has double the risk of heart disease as the result of her workouts. Check out her milk ad at whymilk.com:

All that being said...don't feel quite so guilty about the Labor Day picnic consumption. Maybe your inability to fit into skinny jeans means you'll live longer!

Little League Lessons (A Rant of Sorts)

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 13:32:00 +0000

The Washington Post ran a thought-provoking article yesterday about the state of Little League in the U.S.

While I disagree with the article's premise that televising the Little League World Series pushes kids to grow up too fast (though it may be a contributor), I wholeheartedly agree with the article's opinion on the current state of the League. Kids are being pushed too hard, too early, and at a high cost. Injury rates are skyrocketing, with kids are facing orthopedic surgery at a younger age than ever before, specifically due to overuse of their still-developing arms and shoulders. As a coach myself, I've watched it happen.

Personally, I blame overzealous parents who hope to see their kids make the bigs (much as overzealous parents push their kids too hard to excel academically, in other sports, in music, etc. with the hope their child's success will eclipse their own.) I also find many coaches at fault. They forget about the joy of the sport in their focus on the joy of a win. These attitudes corrupt the sport. These attitudes also corrupt the players, who come to believe that wins (or, at least, chalking up good personal stats) are the be-all, end-all of the game.

So what do you do if you're a parent? How can you ensure that your child's Little League experience is a good one--a safe and rewarding one--in light of the current environment? What if you're a coach dealing with an overzealous parent? Here, a few tips:

If you're a parent:

1) When you register your child for baseball, take the time to peruse your town's/League's website. Get familiar with the safety guidelines. When should helmets be worn? Where can your child safely swing a bat? Insist that your child follow those rules, even if the coach's enforcement is lax. An important guideline concerns the number of pitches a child may throw during any given game or week. These pitch counts are the maximum a child should throw in order to prevent injury. Know your child's number. Respect it. Keep track during games. If you feel your child's coach is pushing the limits, speak up. If your child is playing in multiple leagues (say, Little League and a private league), talk to both coaches about balancing the number of pitches your child throws.

2) Talk to your child early about good sportsmanship. While some major league players are role models, others are not. Encourage your child to follow the former rather than the latter (even if the swagger-and-spit styles of the latter get them on SportsCenter more often.) Remind your child that those players who set a good example earn more respect over time than those who don't.

3) Find out your child's coach's philosophy on the game as soon as possible during the season. If you have a choice of coaches, opt for those who emphasize safety, skills development, and fun over a win-at-all-costs mentality. Your child will be a far better player--and a better person--in the long run. Don't be afraid to question a coach if you feel safety is being compromised. A good coach respects players' parents.

If you're a coach:

1) Know your League's safety guidelines cold. Always, always, always err on the side of safety, whether that's clearing the field if lightning threatens, keeping kids from swinging bats near others, calling an ambulance if a child gets hit in the head and acts disconcerted (even if the parents insist the child is fine because they want their kid back in the game), or when dealing with pitch counts. Personally, I'd rather have a parent yell that I'm deep-sixing their eight-year-old's MLB dreams (go right ahead, parents, I can take it) than risk an injury to a child.

2) Set expectations with both parents and players on day one. When you introduce yourself, let them know your philosophy. Many parents and players will appreciate knowing you value safety first, skills development and fun second, and winning games third. While winning is wonderful--it boosts morale, helps gets kids into the playoffs, etc.--winning alone will never, ever satisfy a player the way they'll be satisfied by a simple love and appreciation of the game itself. (As an aside: in my experience, the teams whose emphasis is on safety, skills development, and fun play better as a team than those whose coaches and players focus on improving personal stats and notching wins.)

3) Watch pitch counts. Respect them. Remember that some kids may be pitching in more than one league and adjust accordingly. And don't forget to keep track of all the throwing that goes on off the mound. If a child will be pitching, don't have them throwing hard the day before. Don't have them throwing around with friends for a half-hour before the game. Limit the number of warmup pitches they throw. It may not be "on the record" but their shoulders and elbows feel it.

4) Respect parents' and players' concerns. If a parent feels their child is being pushed too hard, listen. If a child mentions that their arm is sore, take them at their word and inform the parents so they can discuss it with a doctor. In other words, act appropriately. When your star third baseman says it hurts to throw to first base, don't put him out there, even if it means losing a game.

4) Teach good sportsmanship. If your players start badmouthing the opposing team, nip it in the bud. If the opposing team gets rough during a game, speak to the other coach ASAP. Don't permit your players to retaliate. If your players exhibit bad sportsmanship, bench them and talk to the parents. The parents of the benched player won't be happy, but the other parents will appreciate that you're enforcing the rules--and all the players will learn from it.

5) Lead by example. Be encouraging. Give kids opportunities to try things they haven't been able to do (pitch, catch, play a new position, etc.) Do your best to improve your own skills--both game skills and teaching skills--so you can give your players the best experience possible. Reward good sportsmanship. Make practices fun. Let your own love of the game become contagious.

This season may be over for all but those in the Little League World Series. But by thinking ahead, you can make next season even better--and ensure the next article in the Washington Post is about the positive attributes of Little League.

Nine Pounds

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 23:55:00 +0000

Most writers I know reward themselves after finishing a book, mailing out a proposal, or working through a particularly tricky part of their work-in-progress. It's a great incentive to keep going when the writing isn't easy.

Some writers buy themselves a gift (jewelry, shoes, and handbags seem to be popular amongst my friends.) Others go get a manicure or a massage. Some take a day (or a week) away from the computer to get fresh air and/or travel before diving into the next project. I think rewarding yourself for a job well done is always a good idea, whether you're a writer or not.

Since I wrapped up a new proposal last week, I went to Holliston, Massachusetts (one of the towns featured in Sticky Fingers) to go blueberry picking.

Ever wonder what nine pounds of blueberries looks like? Me, too. Mostly because I picked nine, but only seven and a half made it to the counter for this photo by the end of the day. I was eating them like one might nosh on a bowl of popcorn.

So...seven and a half pounds of blueberries:

Think this isn't a great writing reward? Three words for you: Homemade blueberry cobbler.

Aw, Becks

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 23:18:00 +0000

Another weekend, another sporting event. This time, my view was different than the usual third base line at Fenway Park:

Yep, that would be David Beckham. The LA Galaxy were in town to play the New England Revs, so of course I got to Gillette Stadium for the game. But lest you think I was staring at Becks and ignoring my own team, I'll make it known that he stared at me first:

Oh, I'M KIDDING. There were a bunch of guys yelling at Beckham from the front row, so that look was meant for them, not me. And while I did take a few gratuitous Beckham photos, the rest of the time I had my eyes on the game, which was tight from start to finish. (Though, sadly, the Revs lost.)

If you haven't been to a MLS game yet, GO. They're tons of fun, easy to follow, and unlike baseball and football, you know it's going to be over in 90 minutes so you can get your beauty sleep for work the next day. No overtime, no extra innings. And a major bonus: tix are cheaper!

What are you waiting for?

Too Good For Words

noreply@blogger.com (Niki Burnham) — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 14:41:00 +0000

Here's what happens when you start playing around on the internet when you should be writing: You come across the website for your Dutch publisher, and you get to see what your titles become when translated.

So if you were to go shopping for my books in Amsterdam anytime soon (lucky you...ride a bike on cobblestones while you're there!), be aware that Royally Jacked is actually Prince Charming:

Spin Control becomes Confusing Love, which I understand, since the phrase "spin control" doesn't exactly translate:

Ditto Scary Beautiful, which the Dutch publisher titled Too Good For Words:

And finally, Do-Over becomes Second Chance? (with the question mark in the title):

Which title do you like best? Foreign titles better than the originals? (While I like the sound of Too Good For Words, it makes a pretty big promise as a title! Is ANY book too good for words? Wrap your head around that one....)